Tickling & Suspicions
by Roricus Ponticus
Summary: Sam and Freddie's English teacher has a certain opinion about them he can't seem to get rid of. Oneshot collection. Pre- Seddie. Rated T for cussing and slightly suggestive themes.
1. Maybe you should be

**A/N: Hey guys. So, yeah, my first ever published story. Even if it's just a short oneshot. It's based on a true story, since this happened to me and a friend of mine in English class. It was funny. And embarrassing.**

**In fact my teacher suspected me and my friend being together for a few times. So maybe, if people like this, I'll turn it into a string of oneshots.  
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**Oh, yeah, sorry if there are any mistakes, but English is just my third language. So if there are any mistakes, it would be nice if you could point them out to me so I can correct them. Thanks :)**

**Now, have fun reading, and if you have the time, a review would be nice. :)**

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_Sam POV_

I sighed as I slumped further into my seat. It was the last hour of the school day, and I was bored out of my mind. My notebook lay forgotten at home, so I couldn't even doodle or draw Freddie getting mauled by a whale. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it _is_ possible. Even a kitten could maul such a dork as Fredward.

Haha, that would actually be funny, I could totally see it in my head..a cute little kitten biting of Freddie's fingers. Awesome.

Okay, you're getting distracted, Puckett. You need to focus on the task at hand.

Mission Impossible: Find something non-boring to do in English class.

Yeah, right, like **that** would ever happen.

I looked around the rest of the class and noticed that all of the girls were paying attention. Well, of course they were, our teacher was actually kinda hot. But, not my type. And even if he was, I think I still wouldn't pay attention. I mean, I'm Sam Puckett. I never pay attention in class. Sometimes I don't even _attend_ class.

I looked to my right and saw that Freddie was busy taking notes, listening to the teacher as he talked about formal and informal speech. Who cares about that stuff anyway?

I decided that I was bored enough to annoy Freddork, so I took out a pencil and began poking him in the arm with it.

He stopped taking notes and looked at me with raised eyebrows. "What the hell, Puckett? I'm actually paying attention."

"Yeah, well, don't. I'm bored."

"Do I look like I care?"

Okay, that did it. The nub officially crossed the line.

I started poking him in his stomach and his sides, and I could feel a grin stretching on my face. My boredom was gone, yay!

I continued poking and tickling him and he started to fight back, trying to get a hold of my hands so he could tickle me back. He actually managed once and tickled me with his free hand; I couldn't really help but laugh. Hey, don't blame me, I'm ticklish!

He still had a hold on my other hand and just as I was trying to break his grip (when did he get strong?) our teacher turned to us with a raised eyebrow and a grin on his face.

Freddie still hold my hand under the table, just in case I was going to poke him again.

"Are you two a couple?" the teacher asked, clearly seeing our intertwined hands. And really, I don't blame him, but **how could he think that?**

I mean, really? Freddie and me? Yeah, he may be a nice dork and whatnot, but...no. Really. Nope.

Everyone in class started laughing and I could see Freddie's ears getting a little red tinge. How cute (Note the sarcasm).

"Um, no?" I asked, looking around the class and glaring at a few kids so they would shut up. They would _so _get it later, and I was sure to let them know that.

"Well, maybe you should be."

With that, our teacher turned back to the class and went on about our topic. I turned my head and looked at Freddie in the same moment as he looked at me. I realized hat he still held my hand, so I took it out of his grasp and lay it on the desk. Then I looked up at him again, and saw that he was still studying me, a little blush on his cheeks. Well, I felt like I might be a little red in the face too – not that I would ever admit it.

And even if someone saw it, come on, something incredibly embarrassing just happened. So yeah, I was blushing, big chizz.

But seriously, what's wrong with our teacher? Freddie and I together? Like that would **ever** happen.

Right?


	2. Dancing is stupid

**A/N: Wuhu, an update! :D I know I said I would update like two weeks ago, but..I just had a lot to do. Last week I had 3 days of school and 4 exams. Funny right? (But I was in an amusement park with my best guy friend the other day and got another oneshot idea..) Right now my parents actually think I am learning for my politics exam tomorrow..yeah..:D**

**This oneshot is, once again, based on a true story. It didn't happen exactly like that since I had to adapt it to Sam and Freddie so it wouldn't be OOC, but my teacher suggested me and my friend (same one from last chapter) the same thing. Embarrassing.**

**Oh, right, thanks for all the reviews and favorites! I was shocked when I saw them..I had expected maybe like two reviews or something like that. You guys are amazing! Virtual chocolate cake for all of you! :)**

**I'm gonna finish that horribly long AN now..if anyone is reading this anyway. So have fun, review, you know how it goes. ;)**

**Disclaimer: Ugh, I forgot that last chapter. But, obviously, iCarly isn't mine. It would have been iGibby by now. Gotta love Gibby.  
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I was sitting in English class when I felt my phone vibrate, so took it out of my pocket. Good thing I turned it silent before.

Hiding the phone under my desk I opened it and read the new text.

_Can u pick up sum pb & cheese on ur way home?_

Ugh. Mom again.

Why can't the woman go shopping for once? Well, for food and not bikinis. So now I have to stop by the store again on my way home. (Yeah, I'm actually going home. I was planning on going to Carly's, but, well, now I have to head home. Ugh.)

I quickly sent a _'sure'_ and then put my phone away. Looking to my right I saw Freddie working on our assignment. Oh, yeah, right, our assignment. I already forgot about that.

We had to write some stupid newspaper article on some stupid book. I didn't even read it. But, contrary to popular belief, it wasn't because I didn't like reading, but because it was just plain boring. I read a page and then threw it in a corner of my room.

When I had that bet going on with Freddo that I couldn't read a whole book and read The Penny Treasure, I started to really get into reading. It's so great! Like..you can see a movie in your head, and even though the main plot is given, you can decide on minor details.

Reading is awesome. Tiring, but awesome.

Okay so I'm totally losing track right now. Maybe I should stay on topic: the assignment.

I hadn't even written the headline down yet and we were supposed to be finished in ten minutes.

I looked over to Fredward, hoping that maybe I could copy his article. But what I saw shocked me deeply (yeah, not really considering it _was_ Freddie): the dork had already written two pages.

What the ham?

I mean, sure, he's a nerd (oh yeah), but two pages in ten minutes is downright disgusting. Really.

"Really, Fredward? Two pages? And you're not even finished yet? From what kind of freakish planet are you?" Then I realized what I asked. "Oh, wait, I already know that."

Smirking I leaned back into my seat and folded my hands behind my head.

"Well, at least **I** can write. And **I** will graduate..I wouldn't be so sure about you." he answered.

I gasped and slugged him on the shoulder. "Idiot! Just because I'm lazy doesn't mean I'm stupid! Of _course_ I will graduate!" Well, that may have been a lie, I don't know – I have no idea if I'll graduate. But I kinda hope I do. It would suck if I couldn't get into a culinary arts school because I didn't graduate. Yeeeeah..

"Yeah, you really _are_ lazy." Fredward said laughing and poking me in the side. Oh that idiot, he wants a fight, well he can have it.

I hit him in the shoulder again, same spot as before. "Don't call me lazy!"

He hit me right back, but it didn't really hurt. I mean, he was too much of a pansy to be strong, of course it didn't hurt. I don't think he would be able to ever hurt me.

"But it's true!"

"That doesn't give you the right to say it!" Another hit.

"That doesn't make any sense!" And another.

"Well your face doesn't make any sense!" And another one.

I didn't even realize that we started shouting, or I would have stopped it. It was kinda embarrassing when the teacher (You remember, the hot one? Oh yeah.) walked up to us and loudly cleared his throat. I was just about to hit Fredpuss in the shoulder again (Even though he didn't show it, I know it hurt him. I saw the fear in his eyes. Oh, the wonderful feeling I got out of his pain..-insert evil laugh here-) but took my arm down and smiled innocently at our teacher. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Freddie looking down guiltily. Nub.

"You know what I think you two should do?" the teacher asked grinning at us. We simultaneously shrugged. The whole class was silent and everyone was listening again. "You should go to dancing classes together. Really! Then you would have a reason to touch each other without hurting yourselves!"

Of course everyone was laughing and of course I glared at them, telling them with my eyes to better shut the hell up. No one cared.

I decided to not just sit there like an idiot (like Freddie was) but to respond. "Ugh, no. Dancing is stupid. Besides, Fredward already has dancing classes with Wendy."

"Well, then maybe Freddie should just change his partner."

"Right, I don't think so." With that, I decided that the conversation was over end returned to my assignment.

I felt my cheeks burn a little. Ugh, I was blushing again! Frustrated I let my hair frame my face as I looked down onto my blank piece of paper. Why did this teacher always have to embarrass me? He was my favorite before (that may have been because he was the only sane teacher we had) bit he started to go down in the list rapidly. Damn him for always having to hint at a possible (but really impossible) relationship between me and the dweeb.

I hate teachers. And school. And, most of all, Frednubs. (Okay, not really. I mean, even though I don't like it, he kinda _is _my other best friend besides Carly. I just don't like admitting it. Still I somehow hate him. Can you hate your best friend?..Argh, this is too confusing for me to think about now. I need sleep. And food.)


	3. Don't wanna know

**A/N: Yay, an update! :D School's finally out sooo I'll hopefully have more time to write (if I'm inspired..since I get most of my inspiration in school xD). This one is inspired by something that happened to me _again_ (it's getting old, isn't it? :o). Not exactly like this, but the whole concept is the same. **

**I had a bit of a writer's block (after only 2 chapters? *le gasp*) but listening to Escape The Fate's "Something" (which is also quoted a little in this chapter) really inspired me. It's just so...Seddie to me! :) Listen to it if you get the chance! :P  
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**Oh yeah, there will be slight language (if you consider the F-word slight..) from here on. I really tried to, but I can't lay off the cussing. Sorry. At least now it's rated T for a reason.**

**There will be a note at the end to explain something in the chapter, I put it in there since I didn't want to spoil you. :P So make sure to check it out before you get mad at me or stuff.**

**Thanks for all your reviews, favorites and alerts! They really make me happy! :)  
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**Enjoy! :)**

**DISCLAIMER: Do I really look like I own iCarly? I don't think so..  
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I quickly opened the door, hoping the teacher wouldn't catch me. I was late (again), but this time only a few minutes. Quietly I made my way to my seat

"Hello, Sam, great that you're here too."

I winced slightly before stopping and turning around. In the front stood my teacher, grinning at me.

I rolled my eyes. "Hey, Mr. Miller." (I didn't mention his name before, did I? Well, I did now.)

"Care to explain why you are late?" His grin didn't leave his face once. Bastard.

"No? Not really," I answered and shrugged. He didn't really _demand_ an answer, he just asked, and I didn't want to tell him. So what? He doesn't need to know what I do in my break.

Mr. Miller sighed. "Just don't be late again, okay?" He gestured for me to sit down in my seat.

See why I said he was like my favorite teacher? He's so laid back, I wonder why Ms. Briggs and Mr. Howard didn't try to get him fired yet. Maybe they did and failed?

"Where the hell where you, Sam? Why have you always been late this past week?" Ah, Fredweird. He should know not to question me so much.

"None of your business, fudgeface," I told him, taking out my English things. Not really. Just a pen and a piece of paper so I can pretend to pay attention. Great idea right? I know, I know. I'm genius.

"_Yes_, Sam, it is my business! And Carly's too. She was wondering where you always spent your breaks because you rarely come by the lockers anymore." He sighed. "Really Sam, we are your best friends. You should tell us what you do."

Ah, and there it is again, the best friends business. I don't really wanna think about that now..

And anyways, it's not like I always know what he does in his breaks _(he hangs out with Carls and me by the lockers) _or what kind of apple he likes the most _(green) _or whatever else chiz it is best friends know about each other. So why should I tell him?

Okay, I'll admit it, not telling Carly really makes me feel guilty. But I don't want her to think anything bad about me..or rather _know_ what kind of bad stuff it is that I do.

Well, stuff that's worse from what I usually do. In her opinion it would be, at least.

I kinda started smoking. So what? It's really a stress reliever. I caught Rip-Off Rodney smoking once behind school, he offered me a cigarette and I decided to try it. Since then I usually hang out with him smoking a cig before class starts. After that I always have to drown myself in perfume, but eh, it works.

I just don't want Carly (and maybe Freddie..) to find out so she (they) wouldn't be disappointed in me.

Whatever.

I suddenly realized that I hadn't answered Freddie and turned to him. "I don't _want_ to tell you, so leave me alone, will ya?"

He sighed and shrugged. "Whatever."

It was just when our conversation ended that I heard Mr. Miller talk. Oops.

"..so I'm going to hand you out your assignments now. I will be back by the end of the lesson and I want you to present your results to the class tomorrow, so you still have time to finish it this afternoon. I want you to work in groups of two, so it would be better if you finished it today. But it's your decision to choose what you want to do in your free time."

Ugh. Assignment? Ugh. Groups of two?

..I'll probably pair up with the nerd and let him do all the work. That's a good plan.

Mr. Miller left the classroom (Why did he leave anyway? Maybe I should start listening to the teachers...nah.) and it was silent for a few seconds. After everyone was sure he was out of hearing distance they started blabbing on an on about whatever stuff it is that I don't care about. I didn't listen to their conversations, but really, why would I? I doubted they would say anything that was relevant (oh yeah, I know a smart word!) to me.

It was just when two of the biggest idiots in class (the immature kind not the nerdy ones like Fredward is) started flinging rubber bands at one another (really..? even **I** wouldn't do that) that I got tired of it. So I just got up from my seat wordlessly and sat under the table (so that I could have my peace and wouldn't get hit by a rubber band _(duh)_ ), taking my PearPod with me. I finally started to relax with the music, bobbing my head along to the tune when I felt a presence beside me. Looking to my right I saw Freddie, sitting under the table as well.

Uh..

"What the fuck are you doing here Fredward? That's my spot!" I told him and pushed him away so he fell on his nubbish face. Serves him right. No one disturbs mama's peace (except maybe Carls – but Carly never really counts).

Freddie sat up and brushed himself off. "Really, Sam? I don't think that's necessary. We can share, can't we?"

I sighed and pretended to think, even though I knew he was right. Because, even though he annoys the hell out of me (oh, he does), he's my best friend and I guess I _could_ share my spot with him.

"Okay, on one condition."

"I don't think I have any meat products with me today, sorry."

I lightly punched his shoulder. "Not meat, dumbass. You serve as my pillow. Oh, **and** we're listening to my music, got it?"

He shrugged and then moved around so he sat cross-legged in front of me. "Sure, whatever."

I gave him an earbud from my PearPod, put on my (currently) favorite song (it changes so fast..) and then lied down with my head in his lap. I kinda expected it to be awkward, but come on, we were friends (kinda) since sixth grade. You grow comfortable with each other.

Actually it was pretty damn comfortable. Maybe I should hire Freddie as a personal pillow..

Suddenly I heard another voice then the one of the singer singing along to the song. I looked up to see Freddie's lips moving and realized he was the one singing. It wasn't really bad, but it wasn't good either. Maybe good enough for a karaoke bar or some shit like that. Dunno, never been in one.

"_And now you're screaming, so can you forgive me?"_

At this point I was totally and utterly disturbed. Why does Freddie know the lyrics to my favorite song? He's a geek, so he's supposed to listen to geek music, and not cool stuff like me (oh yeah)!

"Why the hell do you know the lyrics to my favorite song, Fredgeek?"

"Um..because I like it?" he asked and I saw that he was totally confused.

"Yeah but since when do you listen to Escape The Fate? They're too cool for you!"

At this he laughed. Why did the dweeb laugh? I meant it!

"Stop laughing!"

And he laughed harder. I was really starting to get pissed off, so I simply yanked the earbud out of his ear.

"Oh, come on Sam, don't be childish! I happen to like their music, so what, am I not allowed to?"

"NO!"

Really, it was so obvious, why didn't he get it? Argh..boys are so confusing..

"I'm sorry Sam, okay? Just let me listen again," he sighed and pouted a little. He looked so pathetic, I decided to let him listen again. Cause I'm just awesome like that.

"Okay, whatever," I told him and gave him back his earbud. He smiled contently (just like a little child..weird) and plugged it in again.

We continued to listen to music silently for a little while and I actually started to get really sleepy until I was almost asleep, only aware of the music. It was like heaven, considering I couldn't really sleep last night.

Just as I felt myself totally drifting away someone started shaking my shoulder. Groaning I opened my eyes only to find Freddie looking at me from above. He looked kinda different from below, maybe even a little more handsome than usually (There, I said it. I mean, I'm not blind. Even though I don't like to admit it, the nub is kinda handsome, and he has quite a few girls after him..but his dorky personality overweighs his outward appearance. Too bad for him.), but whatever. I still got mad at him for waking me up just at the brink of sleep.

"What?" Yeah, I'm not really eloquent (smart word again!) when I'm tired.

"Wendy saw Mr. Miller come up the hallway, so we should get up.."

He was probably right. I rubbed my eyes for a moment, then I sat up and ran a hand through my hair. Just as I stretched I heard Mr. Miller enter the classroom and sit down in his desk.

Freddie got up from the ground and crawled out from under the table, I followed him a moment after. As we stood to sit down in our chairs, everyone's eyes were on us and I had a feeling of deja vú.

Mr. Miller looked at us with a disturbed expression. "I don't wanna know what you were doing under there.."

At first I didn't get it, but then I took in Freddie's and mine disheveled appearances (you know, from sitting under a table and pushing/being pushed and almost falling asleep) and finally understood what he was hinting at. If I didn't blush the first few times Mr. Miller embarrassed me, I definitely did now.

How could he assume we were doing something like _that_?

It's not that I'm prude (oh no..) but...with Freddie, under a table at school? No way.

I glared at Mr. Miller, but his disturbed expression didn't leave once. By now I was sure he was just acting.

He wouldn't really believe that..would he?

I walked around the table with my head down and just as I was about to sit, the bell ringed to dismiss class. Thank God.

I grabbed my stuff and got the hell out of there. I didn't even want to imagine the rumors that were about to spread..

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**A/N: Okay, so this thing I wanted to explain: Sam starting to smoke. Yeah I know that smoking is bad, believe me (I hate smoking btw, I always try to get my friends to stop..), but it just seems like something that Sam would do to me, just like the whole cussing thing. She already says 'chiz' on the show, as well as 'skunk bag', which to me sound awfully alike to real life cuss words.**

**So yeah, I hope that explains it a bit. **

**I'd be happy if you left me a review! :)  
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